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Leroy

2006-07-02 23:43

  A man named Leroy is drinking in a bar and President Clinton is giving an address on the radio in the background. Leroy looks at the bartender and says, “Yeah, me and Bill go a long way back, used to hang out together and do alot of fun things before he became President……” The bartender looks at him and tells him he doesn't believe him. Leroy asks for the phone, dials the White House and asks for “Bill”; he talks for awhile joking and laughing and presently hands the phone to the bartender who is flabbergasted to be talking to the President of the United States.

  A couple of weeks later, Leroy comes back into the bar. They are watching a golf tournament and Jack Nichlas comes on the screen for a putt. Leroy is like: “Yeah, ole Jack and I go way back……” At this the bartender figures Leroy is full of it so he bets him 20 dollars that Leroy is trying to put one over on him. Leroy grabs the phone and dials and presently is talking animatedly with someone who seems to be named Jack. Bartender steals a glance at the TV screen and sure enough, Jack is talking on a cellular phone; Leroy hands over the phone and the bartender just shakes his head as he discovers that sure enough, it IS Jack on the phone and he hands over his 20 dollars.

  About a week later Leroy comes in once again and this time the Pope is on the television giving a televised benediction. Leroy is like……Yeah, the Pope and I go way back, to before he became Pope and now the bartender is sure that he has him. After the bet the men purchase airfair and fly to Rome for the moment of truth because the bartender is thinking the phone won't be good enough for this one. They are standing in the crowd at the Vatican watching the Pope and as the Pope finishes the Mass, Leroy works his way through the crowd, up the steps, and thebartender is amazed to see him shake hands and the conversation appears to be that which would be expected between long acquaintances.

  Presently, Leroy and the Pope come out into the crowd to meet the bartender and Leroy sees the bartender sprawled flat on his back, passed out cold, and looking pale. He splashes water over his face and shakes him until the bartender finally starts to come out of it. “What happened” asked Leroy.

  The bartender replied: “While you were talking to his holiness, this little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and demanded to know who it was that was up on the dais with Leroy?”

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