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Business one-liners 01

2006-07-08 08:39

  A President of a democracy is a man who is always ready, willing, and able to lay down your life for his country.

  A backscratcher will always find new itches; a brown-noser will always find new sense.

  A bad day fishing is better than a good day at work.

  A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.

  A bird in the hand is always safer than one overhead.

  A bird in the hand is dead.

  A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.

  A boss with no humor is like a job that is no fun.

  A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.

  A closed mouth gathers no foot.

  A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. - Milton Berle

  A committee is twelve men doing the work of one.

  A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

  A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. - Abba Eban

  A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time.

  A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk. - Franklin D. Roosevelt

  A consultant is an ordinary person a long way from home.

  A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place.

  A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.

  A crisis is when you cannot say “let's just forget the whole thing.”

  A day without sunshine is like night.

  A disagreeable task is its own reward.

  A donkey is a horse designed by a study team.

  A fail-safe circuit will destroy others.

  A flying particle will seek the nearest eye.

  A fool and his money are soon elected.

  A fool and his money stabilize the economy.

  A free agent is anything but.

  A friend in need is a pest indeed.

  A geophysicist is not drunk as long as he can hang onto a single blade of grass and not fall off the face of the earth.

  A good scapegoat is hard to find.

  A good slogan can stop analysis for fifty years.

  A good solution can be successfully applied to almost any problem.

  A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.

  A little ambiguity never hurt anyone.

  A little humility is arrogance.

  A little inaccuracy saves a world of explanation.

  A little ignorance can go a long way.

  A man of quality does not fear a woman seeking equality.

  A man should be greater than some of his parts.

  A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer.

  A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the pants.

  A pipe gives a wise man time to think and a fool something to put in his mouth.

  A penny saved has not been spent.

  A penny saved is an economic breakthrough.

  A penny saved is ridiculous.

  A problem cannot be solved using the same level of thinking that created it. (In other words, if you screw it up, you can't fix it.)

  A real person has two reasons for doing anything……a good reason and the real reason.

  A short cut is the longest distance between two points.

  A short line outside a building becomes a long line inside.

  A stagnant science is at a standstill.

  A theory is better than its explanation.

  A transistor protected by a fast-acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.

  A well-adjusted person is one who makes the same mistake twice without getting nervous.

  Ability is a good thing but stability is even better.

  Ability is like a check, it has no value unless it is cashed.

  Absolutum obsoletum. (If it works, it is out of date.) - Stafford Beer

  According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.

  According to the official figures, 43% of all statistics are totally worthless.

  Adding manpower to a late software product makes it later.

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